Hi to all my online classmates,
My name is Belle and I am excited to start sharing/learning with you all throughout the semester. Hope some interesting opinions and discussion stem from this class and feel free to ask me any questions or leave any comments whenever!
(My Storybook Website)
Here's to a great semester,
Belle
I have always been interested in Greek Mythology- which is actually why I took this class in the first place! I was really excited to read your project.
ReplyDeleteI think your intro is really neat- i love that you took a quote from your three characters. It definitely makes me interested to read more about the 'one sole event' that brought all three of these characters together.
My prediction is that the 'mother', 'wife', and 'daughter' are all the same person. Could all three of these stories st em from the same person?
I can't wait to read your stories when you publish them! Great start, it's coming along nicely.
Belle,
ReplyDeleteI like how you opened up your introduction with quotes from the three main characters. It sets up their motivations, and makes the reader excited to see how your story turns out in the end. I also like your unique, prose like, writing style. Not all of the introductions have set up the storytelling style, they just provide the necessary information. It also does a great job of convincing the reader to dive headfirst into your story. Finally, I like how your last statement sets up the fact that you may have a vague ending, or in other words an ending that is open to interpretation. I think that when authors do this, it creates discussions between the readers that gets them even more emotionally involved in your story.
Thanks so much for sharing, I really enjoyed reading your storybook. You have a great idea, good luck with finishing the rest of your storybook.
Andrew Wright
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHey Belle,
ReplyDeleteYour website design fits very well with your Storybook topic! I love the font you chose.
I really like the format of your introduction. The parallelism in each of the three character's statement shows us how each of the characters have different voices, but at the same time, they are all similar and interconnected. I also really like your idea for the story. Instead of taking a single perspective from a distant narrator, why not assume the form of each of the main agents in the story and tell their side of it? So great!
I'm really excited to see how your Storybook unfolds! You've got a great start going.
The only criticism I have for your introduction is the centered text makes it a little hard to read. Also, I wonder if you could improve the story a bit by giving us a little more information about each of the characters. What else describes Hades, Persephone, and Demeter besides what their titles are in the realm of the gods?
Keep up the good work!
Joe Wagner
I really like the style of your blog! The colors go really well together and the font is perfect for your theme. I like the image you used for your introduction as well. It gives me a good idea for what is coming in your storybook.
ReplyDeleteI like how you started with quotes from each of the people you will talk about. It starts the dialog off well between the reader and the stories. I think if you added pictures of each of the gods and goddesses, it would add a more visual element to the introduction.
I like how you asked the reader a question and let them decide for themselves what they think instead of imposing your thoughts on them. It is like you are simply the messenger. I think you could make the hints of what is coming more intense. I like how you set up your stories. It is different and I am excited to get to read them later on in the semester! Good work so far. Keep it up!
I love your topic and your direct introduction. Stories come out differently, depending on the author’s perspective. In your topic, you chose to tell a very popular story with the perspectives of all main characters. This is a very interesting approach for this project. Like the statements you made in the introduction, these characters were not evil. They did what they did just because in their perspective they are not wrong. It is not Persephone’s fault for wanting to go back to her mother. It is not Hades’s fault to want to keep his loved one close to him. It’s definitely not Demeter’s fault to want her daughter back from someone who forcefully abducted her. I hope you can change the font of the story larger and with more distinct color. It is a bit difficult for reader to read such small font. You did a great job in the introduction. I am excited to read your upcoming story.
ReplyDeleteWow. Your introduction is incredible. It was so elegant and flowed perfectly. I felt like I was in a trance going from one sentence to the next. The sentence length and the paragraph lengths were perfect. It gave enough information to get the reader hooked and interested and helped leave them wanting more. The introduction had a very mystical feel to it that goes perfectly with a story about gods and goddesses. I have always liked this story and I think it's interesting that you are doing it from all three perspectives of the main characters.
ReplyDeleteI really like how you start your first story with the author's note. I haven't read a story that has started that way and I thought it was very beneficial to your storybook. It helps give the reader enough information going in to the story to fully understand where you are going and it also solidifies the concept of you telling the story from three different perspectives. I really enjoyed reading your first story. It was well thought out and didn't miss a beat. It was told exactly as I would assume a mother would tell such a story. Overall I think you are doing a really great job and I can't wait to read the next stories.
Belle,
ReplyDeleteWow when I opened your page it intrigued me. It is a beautiful set up. I love the photo on the opening page. The coloring of your site really sets the mood for these stories. I really liked you introduction. I made me understand what was about to happen. I do suggest moving your introduction tab above your first story. This way the first thing people read is your introduction not your story.
Now onto your story. When I first opened it I thought I had clicked on the wrong tab. This is because of the author's notes that are at the top. It also makes it look like your authors notes is the title of this page. Maybe think about moving the authors notes to the bottom, so your readers can read your story first. After reading your story I can see why you put the authors notes first. But I feel like having those first takes away from your beautiful story.
I really enjoyed reading your story. It kept me on my toes. I couldn't wait to see what happened next. I'm excited to follow this site to see where it goes. Keep up the great work!
I chose to read your story because I love Greek mythology. So much so, I devoted part of my major to the subject.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your take on the story and I like that you included quotes from each character in your introduction. I do wish you had incorporated more about the actual person though. Maybe just some more description about each person.
Also, your first story gets a little confusing toward the end when you are explaining the arrangement of the months. You might consider reading back through it clearing it up a bit. Also, another read through for grammar sake might be beneficial. This is an area I personally struggle in a lot as my fingers are never as fast as my brain and I get carried away.
This is one of my favorite mythology tales and I am really looking forward to seeing where you take this, your initial set up Is really awesome!
Hi Belle,
ReplyDeleteI have always loved Greek Mythology. This subject was the main reason why I decided to take this class so I was really excited when I had the opportunity to read your storybook this past week!
Your introduction really drew me in. I like how instead of choosing three separate stories to write about, you chose one story to tell from three different point of views. I thought that the first story from Demeter's point of view was executed excellently. I like how you had each set of three sentences start the same way. It made it flow really well and also tied in with your title. I'm kind of disappointed that I won't be able to read Hades and Persephone's point of view but I guess I can just use my imagination! Great job!
Hi Belle,
ReplyDeleteI have already read your introduction and your first story before so I don't have a lot of feedback to give you! I did see that you made some changes though. I still really like the introduction to your storybook. As I read it again I was reminded how much I enjoyed it the first time. The way it is written is so intriguing that I could read it numerous times and still feel that sense of intrigue every time. It really is beautifully written.
As I read your story again I noticed you moved the author's note. I read some of the other comments and I can see why you made that change. I still thought that it was interesting to have it in the beginning and I thought it worked for reminding the reader that it was only one perspective, but I can see why it would also take away from your story. Overall your story still looks great though! I really am interested to read the next installments.
Hello Belle,
ReplyDeleteI think your 3 statements went very well together. Very Parallel and reflective of their emotion. The only thing that I found difficult to understand what exactly you were trying to do after you explained the statements and then at the very end. the middle part just seemed unsettled.
I think you did an excellent job Belle in telling your story of Demeter's Dilemma. I am a big fan of Greek mythology and found this story to be very interesting. It flows well an contains great insight into the characterization.
Hey Belle, I think you did a great job with creating this story book. It such an original and creative idea to take three stories of different gods who are all related and tie them together through one major event. A few things stood out to me in your story though. You had quite a few spelling and grammatical errors which disrupted the great flow that your story had going. However, I loved the dramatic tone you wrote this in because it just fits so well with the idea of Greek gods and goddess. You have a lot of parallelism all throughout your story which emphasizes that dramatic tone even more. Something I thought was really cool was that you played into the idea that although Hades had kidnapped persephone, he did it because he loved her and was convinced that she felt the same way. While it is an awful thing to do, he had good intentions and this is something that few people touch on when talking about the god Hades. Great insight and awesome work!
ReplyDeleteHey Belle! Let me just say that I was super excited to read your storybook since I love anything that has to do with Greek mythology. I was super intrigued just by your cover photo. The whole website layout compliments your theme. Not only that but the way you opened up your introduction with quotes, it just adds another level of intrigue. Knowing their motivations really hooks us as readers.You can really see the subtle differences in the characters. You did a wonderful job writing it, it flowed so well. It gave enough information to hook readers without being too direct. You keep us wanting more. I do I agree with Annie about maybe adding pictures of the goddesses. It'll help us visualize the characters. It's not that big of a deal if you don't though if you don't. I like that you made it apparent to readers that the characters aren't evil, just human. You give us an understanding as why thy did what they did. Great Job!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed the way you began the story. It had a unique feel to it, and every sentence gave insight into what Hades was like. At first, I felt like it took away from the flow of the story, but it set the tone for the narrator's voice. That was probably my favorite part of the story. Your storybook looks awesome as well. The cover photo and format are great. Good job!
ReplyDelete